Today is Purple Day, the International Day for Epilepsy Awareness. I already have on my purple and Andrew is wearing his on the set of "Under the Dome".
Oliver isn't dressed yet, or even up because he had a nasty seizure to start his morning.
Face down in the covers, gasping for breath, gagging and limp. I hastily turn on lights to see if he is still breathing, make sure his lips aren't blue, kiss his chubby cheeks, run my hands through his blonde hair.
I hate these seizures so much and as I walk down the stairs, I'm tempted to feel sorry for myself. Sorry for him, for us. I'm tempted to wear this purple all day and mourn. Mourn the loss of so many dreams, of so much he'll never know about life. Mourn that I haven't heard "I Love You" in months and that he has never asked us a question, not even once in his whole life.
BUT, I'm going to make a different choice. Today I'm going to wear the purple and think of the incredible families and children we've been honored to meet (Netta, Mia, the other Oliver, Charlie Claire, Sophie, Carlie, Ryan, Zoe, Dylan, Celia and so many more).
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| Purple Day 2013 |
I will think of you, all of our friends and family in your purple. Driving your cars, checking your email, eating lunch, covered in purple for our Oliver.
Today, I will give thanks even when I want to mourn all the tiny deaths....
For there is so little we can change,
except our attitude.
Happy Purple Day 2014!
3 comments:
This hurts my heart so much. I pray all the time for sweet Oliver, that he will get some reprieve from the nastiness that is epilepsy. I just know in my heart that the CBD is going to be awesome for him. I wish he could start it right this second! Much love for you all.
Beautifully written sweet friend! Proud to wear purple in your family's honor today. God is pleased that you see the beauty in the ashes. I love you all and your sweet little boy.
That is a great picture of your family.
I understand the feeling of pity. There is also a feeling of anger, sympathy, and so many more. Never doubt - these are all healthy to experience. I am just so happy you also carry a feeling of gratitude.
I wish the best for you all@
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